Counselling

I am passionate about helping people in their relating to others. Many relationships would be enhanced if people learned and used certain skills: assertiveness, stress relief, listening, reflection, empathy, and positive regard. We can change our view of the world, and also that of others. Many relationships would not founder if people used these skills in the course of their day, at work, with friends, family and those we meet every day or just once in passing. Wouldn't you like to have the tools to cope with the major issues in your life with hope and optimism?

Marriage:

I am particularly dedicated to helping couples stay together. While that may not always be possible, or even wise in some couples' cases, it is an important task to undertake. Marriages are breaking up at alarming rates, and many people later on regret their decision to divorce. People embark on subsequent marriages which can turn out to be unhappy and unhealthy. I acknowledge that it is the "sand in our shoes" that destroys relationships more than the boulders we fall over. It is not usually major life-shattering events that break up couples, but the small things that eat away at the fibre of the relationship until there is little or nothing left to salvage. I want to help people see clearly what is happening to their relationship, to turn it around and decide to make it as good as it can be. Some people may decide that they do not have what it takes to stay together, and I will help them to honour their feelings, to let go, and move on as peaceful and amicable as possible.

Remarriage:

Many people are not prepared for the emotional and financial minefield of remarriage, and easily fall into despair when subsequent relationships fail. People need to explore what lies behind the choices they make, why they slow destructive patterns, how they can solve the problems that can be solved, and how to learn to live with what cannot be changed.

The Holistic Approach:

In many cases the presenting problem of the client is not the main issue. The first session with a new client will be an assessment session, when the client will be asked many questions about his/her life from birth to present day. Careful consideration and discussion of the client's information often leads to hidden issues, needs or a physical health problem. The person needs to be viewed as a whole person, not labeled by their ailment. Counselling with a holistic approach will ensure no aspect of the person's life is disregarded. If none of my skills appear to meet the person's needs, there are several practitioners to whom I can refer.

Loss and Grief:

You may know someone who was amazingly stoic through the illness and death of a loved one only to fall apart months or even years later. Many of us stuff down our feelings, to have them surface with a fury, causing much more pain and stress than the original event. Some people suffer ongoing ill-health, depression, pains and discomfort with no known cause. acknowledging your feelings, leaning into the pain, and letting yourself grieve could be the healthiest thing you could do.